Bill’s Content

Scarlett Johansson has been breaking into neighbor’s apartments?

She explains, “I was coming home, it was very late, mind you, it was like four in the morning. Maybe I’d had like one too many champagne cocktails, or whatever… But I got home, of course I wasn’t driving, and I opened my door and it wasn’t my kitchen! It was somebody else’s kitchen and I left and I realized my key opens up somebody else’s door in my building. It like slides right in and opens it up!

“I slammed the door shut as quickly as I could and I ran to the stairs because I didn’t want them to think, ‘Who the hell was that?’ It was a disaster! Then I thought maybe I should go back and see if they had a can of Coke or something… I just got back from Venice (from the Venice Film Festival), so I don’t have any groceries!”

I have several thoughts:

First: Drunkenly walking into someone else’s apartment strikes me as something Linday Lohan or Courtney Love might do. Please, Scarlett. Do NOT become like Lindsay Lohan or Courtney Love. I would cry if you went into rehab.

Second: Girl, you have GOT to get a new lock on your door. If your key matches someone else’s apartment, then their key matches YOURS. And exactly why are you NOT living in a mansion with security guards? Hmmm?

Third: Polly Peoria tells us she and Scarlett are roomies, so I imagine that when Scarlett got back to her apartment, she and Polly probably took a nice relaxing bubble bath together and braided each other’s hair. Which has nothing to do with this incident, per se, but I like imaginging it.

[tags]Scarlett Johansson,Lindsay Lohan,Courtney Love[/tags]

… And Mickey Mouse’s ears are famous, too.

[tags]Lindsay Lohan,Mickey Mouse,Disney[/tags]

Here’s the funny thing: Lindsay is actually a talented actress (year, she’s no Drew Barrymore, but still). She’s always had to work for a living — in fact, she seems to have been supporting her parents from her child star days. Yeah, her behavior’s been poor, and she doesn’t seem “with it” at times. But for some reason, she gets loads more bad press than someone who wasn’t brought up by poor excuses for parents and who, in fact, has never HAD to work a day in her life: Paris Hilton. I’m glad to read she’s decided to take better care of her increasingly impressive movie career. Meanwhile, Paris is making a few commercials and one really bad reality television show.

[tags]Lindsay Lohan,Paris Hilton[/tags]